WHY IS FAILURE SUCH A TEMPTING ENEMY? Have you ever had the notion, “Wow, I really screwed up,” when you looked back on your life?
Out of nowhere, it comes at you like a ton of bricks. The next thing you know, your thoughts are clouded by regretful memories of your previous blunders. One moment you are thinking about your future chances.
For me, it makes sense that people would think that way. We live in a culture that shows us images of perfection and provides us with avenues to perhaps achieve that high-minded (and totally unrealistic) ideal.
Once we’ve tried a few times and failed, we’ve fallen into this pit of believing we aren’t deserving of anything—happiness, love, friendship, or anything else.
Entering failure is conceding defeat and giving up. Finally, we reach a point where we no longer want to attempt because we have sunk so low. Our future holds no hope anymore. All we do is reflect on our past mistakes and accept that our future failures are our lot in life.
What’s the sense of trying again when I already tried twice and failed to achieve that job promotion?
Every time I try to eat healthier, I find that after a few days I have a sugar binge. I’ve given up on my ability to complete this.
I want to be loved so much, but every relationship ends in divorce. I can’t help but feel that I’m to blame. Now that I’m single, it guarantees that I won’t be harmed by anyone again.
You might be thinking of a parallel narrative. We’ve all gone through a life incident (or numerous) that made us feel that there is no chance for improvement at some point. We hide in our worries and accept failure before we’ve ever had a chance to conquer it when we ultimately get so tired of believing that we aren’t good enough.
Looking ahead is not always simple. You are entirely correct! One of the most difficult things you’ll ever have to accomplish is to look forward. You can be going through a fatal disease, going through a breakup, losing your job, or being buried under debt. All of these are incredibly overwhelming and soul-suffocating. It aches. It’s tougher to hope. Failing is simpler.
It’s a trap, though.
You see, by accepting defeat and failure, we are communicating to the outside world that we are content with following the rules. The days will come and go, and life will move on, but are we really fulfilling our individual missions here on earth?
No, we’re a ship that’s going down and we’re reaping more than we’re sowing.
Consider it like this: Consider yourself a pitcher in a tied game with two outs, bases loaded, and a full count in the ninth inning. You reflect on the previous time this scenario occurred and you lost as you stand on the mound. Are you going to give in to your fear or will you use your strongest argument in the hopes that it will succeed this time?
WHY IT’S IMPORTANT AND TERRIFYING TO LOOK AHEAD Did all the sports talk confuse you? If so, allow me to explain it to you as follows:
The fact is, we can never predict what will happen. The only things we can be certain of are what has already happened and where we are right now. Failure is so alluring because it gives us the security of knowing what will happen, preventing us from becoming unhappy or vulnerable once more.
Sadly, there is a price for such comfort.
When we stop wishing for the future, we lose the chance to improve not only our own lives but also the world in which we live. Even if you can be going through a dreadful occurrence right now, you have a choice: you can either live in the fear that comes with the statistics and previous experiences, or you can have faith that this tragedy will somehow lead to a positive transformation.
But it’s difficult.
Certainly, it is. It’s awful. It scares me. But guess what? The moment you take that leap of faith could change your life forever.
I don’t know about you, but at the end of the day, I want to be able to say that I lived with optimism and refrained from being controlled by my anxieties and regrets from the past.
Looking ahead inspires hope while looking back inspires fear. It’s challenging to explore this idea. I continue to put in just as much effort as everybody else!
Say some of the following to yourself if you’re finding it difficult to quit dwelling on your failure and wish to move forward with hope:
I don’t have to be affected by what happened yesterday today. Although difficult, this situation can nevertheless be used for good. Risk-taking can occasionally result in the greatest benefits. My life was created with a greater goal in mind; I wasn’t created to fail, but to become stronger through my challenges. I hope you are healthy and can move forward with faith in the knowledge that you are being perfected by the difficulties you are going through. I’d be happy to offer encouragement or support if you’d like to share anything in the comments section below.